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Oh, the Irony: Michael Bisping Suffers Detached Retina, Out of Action Until October

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(Tomax, meet Xamot. Photo via Getty Images.)

Look, we know we’ve been declaring a lot of things to be “ironic” around here lately, but this…this is just ridiculous.

On yesterday’s edition of UFC Tonight, Ariel Helwani revealed that middleweight contender and prestigious member of the citizenry, Sir Michael of Bisping — the very same who once scribed that a certain dullard from Mississippi had “given himself a career-threatening eye-strain by watching too much internet porn” — has suffered an identical deformation. Even worse, the injury came as a result of a tussle with the very same dullard whom “The Count” both rebuked for said addiction to thinking machine-based lewdness and nearly blinded in the very same contest.

In common folk speak, we are trying to say that Michael Bisping suffered a detached retina during the very same UFC 159 fight in which he nearly took Alan Belcher’s right eye home with him. And that is ironic.

“After the fight against Alan Belcher, Michael Bisping completely lost all peripheral vision in his right eye,” Ariel Helwani reported yesterday. “He went to see an eye on doctor on Tuesday and he found out that he had a detached retina. On Thursday, he had surgery to fix the detached retina. He’s hoping to return to the UFC in October.”

No word yet on whether or not Bisping will be interested in a potential catchweight fight with Rich Franklin when he returns, but we will keep you updated.

-J. Jones


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